3 Easy Steps to Communicating Accumlated Negative Emotions

There are two types. Ones who are able to communicate any negative emotions or anger immediately and others who tend to accumulate. Everyone has different level of tolerance. It's debatable as to which one is better. Some habits are hard to give up.

If you are accumulating type you absorb lot of things you don't like and don't convey immediately. You think, Its not good idea to keep cribbing. It builds up the baggage. There on a very trivial scenario at some point breaks you down. Other person involved might see it as overreaction. Its not. It has built up over period of time.

On such trigger occasion control your emotions. Dont spoil the relations that you have built for long time and never burn down the bridges of the communication. Most of issues can be sorted out. If you are of the accumulating type read the 3 simple steps of how to communicate them when it goes beyond your tolerance point. 

[1] Notice: Communicate your negative emotion in written communication 

It's important to start the initial communication in the written form after final trigger. This allows other 

party to think about it and prepare for the discussion. Its something similar to government  organizations sending notice prior to action. Allow the other person to prepare. Communicate clearly each of the major instances which had upset you and what was your expectations. 

[2] Discussion: Bring it now to Face to Face over a table

Agree, written communications cannot convey all the emotions. But just emotions of triggering moment can be very destructive. So if you were to take up the discussion at the trigger point you would startle the other party. It might seem like overreaction and might put other person in defensive position. It would not lead to resolution of the issues. Instead it can blow out of proportions.

If you do it after the notice,  other person is prepared with arguments and his side of the story. So it becomes relatively easy to express your  negative emotions more constructively. It also has likelihood of closure on the resolution.

[3] Agreement: Close the resolution and move on

After its closed, write it down and pass it to other party to convey what was agreed. This ensures that it gives the fair chance to other person to correct something if there were any mis-interpretations.

After this step move on. Genuinely clear yourself off and continue to build your relationships further.

5 Task Management tips to Minimize Fire Fighting

Last moment blasts in unexpected areas and working late to extinguish the fire in those areas, is probably not a new experience for many. Its so popular that some take pride in being called as a fire fighters. Bottom line is people get hurt during fire fighting and quality of products suffers.

Its a challenge to completely prevent it but it can be reduced. There are multiple aspects that needs to be worked on to prevent it. One of them is doing the right tasks management.  Following are 5 tips to manage the task lists to ensure fire fighting can be minimized.

[1] Tasks list & Priorities

First step is to have the tasks lists. If you don't have a proper task tracking system you are at very high risk and more prone to get in to fire fighting situations. So establish one first. Let me tell you,  Its very easy to create one. Its more like saying, It easy to quit smoking, I have done it many times. Challenge is to keep it alive. By alive, I mean keeping it current. There are loads of tools out there that can help you manage the tasks lists. Most of them are good. 

All cribbing about them is really failure to  religiously believe in them and putting effort to manage the task lists. It does take effort. Its extremely important to keep the task lists classified, actionable and assigned to right owners. Remember ABC of good tasks management, inspired from movie glengarry glen ross, is "Always be Closing". 

Before picking the tasks for execution understanding the priorities is a key. After you have the prioritized list ready in your hand watch out for the following. 

Tasks that must be done for core functionality are generally well defined and will normally be done in time. Well defined tasks generally do not contribute to fire fighting situations. Following are some of the types of tasks need a special attention. If not watched out, can lead to fire fighting situations. 

[2] Ambiguous tasks

Tasks that have high level of ambiguity needs to be kept under radar all the time. Keep working on these to get to next level of clarity. Ambiguous tasks have ability to topple all your plans. These are like black holes. Can suck everything in them. Leaving them unaddressed for long is a big risk. Sometimes it can mean whatever other things done around it may become useless or may need significant rework. Deal with the ambiguity and take it to clarity. If you have delegated it, you must also act as catalyst to accelerate the process of getting to clarity. 

[3] Stinky tasks

Someone's got to do the dirty job. Don't just keep procrastinating these. If it means getting into manhole then do. If you don't do it in time, its going to flood and make things more messy. Its normal that if you have delegated such tasks you need to put in little extra work with the stakeholders to make these happen. Stinky tasks are not always bad. Some times while digging in the manhole you may discover the  hidden treasure and it may turn out to be an opportunity in disguise. Bottom line is irrespective of whether it turns to treasure or dump it should be dealt with in time. 

[4] Weed in core task lists

Even the core tasks that are well defined and generally get done may not happen in time, if weed is not trimmed. Like weed in any fertile land, even in the well defined tasks, have a weeds growth. Weeds grow because of additional requirements discovered, change in requirements, implementation issues, tasks switching hands are some to quote. Sometimes these weeds may mask the primary task itself. Watch out for them and clean them up periodically. Cut the weed tasks and keep the core tasks list focused on the real primary tasks. 

[5] Strategic tasks

These tasks do not provide immediate benefit. These are like sharpening the axe before cutting the trees. Effectively it won't give you immediate productivity but in the longer run you might benefit exponentially. So do pay attention to strategic tasks. Take some risk or hit to get some of such potential benefit tasks done. Balance between the priority and potential. These tasks have to identified and have to be executed among the priority tasks.